Title: Angels in a Cage: Chapter Eighteen, Falling for You
Rating: PG-13 [language]

Summary: Chris and Alyssa both receive advice regarding the other.






He had agreed to her terms. They seemed reasonable, prudent at the time. But now four hours later, lying wide awake in his guest bed once more, Chris was not sure he liked her rules at all. Maybe if he hadn’t kissed her, hadn’t felt the immediate spark from that innocent exchange, it would not feel like such a big deal. But it was; it certainly was. He had fallen in love with a beautiful and innocent young woman. It certainly had not been his plan or intentions. Hell two nights before he was merely looking for something to do besides drink.

It had to be fate; that was the only explanation Chris could come up with. He was fated to love Alyssa. It was not reasonable, not in the least. He was a married man – unhappily but married all the same. Of course that was something that was changeable; he just had to figure out how to do so with minimal impact on the band. Or maybe he didn’t need a band any more. He did have certain obligations to them, but when those were fulfilled, maybe it was time to move on. He certainly did not need the money any more – unless of course, Alyssa was far more high maintenance than he expected.

He was over thinking things, clearly. He needed to shut his thoughts up and go to sleep. Even though it was Sunday, Susan would like want him to be doing something. He wouldn’t be able to lie around all day, thinking about the pretty girl whom he stole kisses from. Maybe he would just load up the dogs and head up into the mountains. Susan wouldn’t stop that. In fact that was an excellent idea. He would do it immediately, before she even got up.

Pivoting out of bed, he stretched his long legs and smiled down at the two large dogs sleeping at his bedside, “Hey guys. You wanna go up and play in the trees?”

Jesse lifted his head, looked at Chris, and laid back down.

“Too early?” he asked, glancing at the clock and noticing the red numbers claimed it to be just after four. “Too early. Well, I’ll have some coffee, see if there’s anything on TV, and check with you guys in about an hour? Maybe we can even invite Eddie to come with us? We haven’t spent much time with Eddie lately.”

Drinking coffee and watching an infomercial a few minutes later, Chris could not help his thoughts from running right back to Alyssa. He wished he knew why he was so very… obsessed with her, but then again he didn’t. Yes, she was beautiful. Yes, she seemed intelligent. Yes, she seemed grounded. Yes, she didn’t seem to care he was famous. Was that it? Was the last thought the reason he wanted to spend so much time with her; the fact she treated him like any other man, not Chris Cornell superstar? No. He refused to believe it was something as superficial as that. There had been plenty of people who pretended he was just a normal person before Alyssa. Ah, but they had pretended and he knew that. She was not pretending. She was uncompromisingly real. She was real.

Noticing the TV had clicked over from whatever miraculous machine he could clearly live without to the early morning news; Chris realized he had once more gotten lost in his thoughts about a girl. But early morning news meant the rest of the world was likely waking up. It would not be too ridiculous to call Eddie now. If he was anything like Chris, he would be up already – though unlikely from lack of sleep due to a girl. He would call up his buddy and the two of them could head up to the cabin for a few days and drink and catch up on thing – just as long as they were back by Friday so he could see Alyssa again.

Thirty minutes later he was loading the dogs up into the truck and heading towards Eddie’s house. From the tone in Eddie’s voice, he seemed to want to get out of the house as much as Chris had. They stopped for coffees and a few other provisions before heading into the hills. Neither really spoke, neither really needed to – at least yet. Chris was content to drive silently, listening to the sounds of the heavy machine beneath him, feeling the bumps and personality of the road. It almost kept his thoughts away from Alyssa, almost.

“So you guys finished up recording?” Eddie broke the silence.

Chris glanced at his best friend, “Yeah, we did. I wanted to take a break, but Susan insisted we start rehearsing for tour. We haven’t even finished mixing the fucking album and she wants us to think about promoting it already.”

“Remind me again why you married her?” he smirked.

“Because I had to,” he responded. “But I don’t think… I don’t think it’s going to last much longer.”

“Why’s that?”

“Besides the fact she’s a fucking bitch I can’t stand to be around?”

Eddie nodded while chuckling.

“I met someone.”

There was a brief moment of silence as Eddie processed the declaration, “Someone worth leaving your wife for?”

“Someone worth leaving everyone for.”



The door opened slowly, bright sunshine from the skylights spilling into the purple-painted bedroom. A young girl slowly entered, balancing a tray with a variety of breakfast foods on it. There really was little reason for her to be bringing her sister breakfast in bed, except for the fact it was closer to noon than anything else and Judith really wanted to hear about her older sister’s activities the night before. So she placed the tray on Alyssa’s nightstand and sat on her sister’s bed, softly shaking her awake.

“Aly? Aly, wake up,” she requested softly.

“Mmmmm, what do you want, Judi?” she murmured as she rolled over to face her sister.

“Well you missed church so I brought you breakfast,” she claimed.

Alyssa smiled crookedly, “Thanks, little one.”

Waiting as her sister sat up, Judith clicked on the dim bedside lamp, “So you were out late.”

“Yes, I was,” she confirmed, looking over the tray of food. “Did you do this all yourself, Judi?”

“Mom helped,” she responded.

“How sweet,” Alyssa smiled, reaching for the tray.

“I’ll close the door,” the younger girl declared and hurried to do just that.

Eating a few bites of the food on the plate, she watched her sister drag the chair from her desk to sit patiently at Alyssa’s side. She ate for a few minutes, just knowing her silence was driving Judith nuts. It was ever more evident when the younger girl wiggled in the chair and sighed loudly. Rather than give in, Alyssa continued in silence for another minute.

“Aly!” Judith expressed.

“It was wonderful,” she replied vaguely.

“Are you going to see him again?”

“After work on Friday.”

“But you don’t work on Friday!”

“I don’t?”

Judith frowned, “Did you forget, Aly?”

She looked at the piece of toast in her hand, trying to figure out what Judith was alluding to. Why would she have a Friday off? What was she supposed to be doing with Judith? It wasn’t a holiday, she knew that. It was just a regular – oh shit. Judith was performing in the choir that night. That’s why she wasn’t working. How was she going to tell Chris?

“No, of course I didn’t,” she finally responded. “You have choir that night.”

Her younger sister smiled at that response, “So what are you going to do about Chris?”

“Well, with your permission I would still like to see him that night, but only if it’s okay with you,” she stated.

“I don’t know. You have to tell me about last night first.”

“Well I had to work late so he stayed at the coffeehouse with me. And then we walked down to the piers and just talked,” Alyssa stated simply.

“Nuh uh,” Judith responded. “Something had to have happened.”

“Well,” she flushed slightly before finishing her toast. “He did kiss me.”

“OH MY GOD!” she squealed before realizing what she had done and glanced at the closed door. “He did!?”

“Twice,” Alyssa confirmed.

“What was it like?”

“Perfect. Absolutely perfect,” she claimed, reaching for the glass of juice. “But I told him to not do it again.”

Judith’s eyes went even larger, “Why!?”

“It’s complicated, Judi,” she stated before shifting the tray off of her lap to head to the bathroom.

Picking at her sister’s food while she waited, the younger girl called out to her, “But if it was perfect, don’t you want more?”

“It’s not about what I want,” Alyssa stated before turning on the sink to wash her hands. “It’s about what’s right. And it’s not right for us to be kissing.”

“Why not?”

Returning to her bed, she picked up a sliced strawberry and stuck it all in her mouth, swallowing before answering, “It just isn’t. Maybe someday it will be okay to kiss again. But it isn’t right now.”

Judith sighed, “Don’t be stupid, Aly. It was perfect. It’s right now.”

“It’s not, little one,” she touched her sister’s nose. “It just isn’t. You know what though? We should get dressed and go out and find you something pretty to wear at your performance Friday.”

“Really?” Judith’s eyes lit up.

“Really. You wanna take the tray back downstairs while I get dressed? We’ll go soon,” Alyssa stated.

“Okay!” Judith jumped up, quickly hugging Alyssa. “You’re the best sister ever.”

Within an hour, the two girls were wandering about downtown Seattle. They had briefly considered just going to one of the malls, but Alyssa convinced Judith otherwise, telling her that all the other girls in her class would shop at the mall and if she wanted something special, they should go elsewhere. The nine year old eagerly accepted her sister’s suggestion, beaming when she was taken into ‘big girl’ stores for accessories and the like. She just knew she was going to be the envy of all the girls in her class and in her choir. She did have the best sister ever.

They shopped for about three hours, with a break in between to stop at the coffeehouse for drinks. Alyssa also took that moment to confirm her day off with her boss and explain the situation with Donna. He assured her that he would not only talk to Donna but see what he could do about not scheduling them together. With that accomplished, she led her little sister to the last place she had in mind, figuring they could find some shoes to go with Judith’s new dress. The selection was vast, but the young girl chose a pair of Mary Janes, not unlike Alyssa’s favorite pair within the first few minutes in the store. They still had plenty of time before heading home for dinner.

“What do you want to do now, little one?” Alyssa asked as they left the store, Judith happily swinging her shoe bag.

“I dunno,” she responded. “What do you wanna do?”

She chuckled, “I asked you for a reason, silly goose.”

“Wanna go in there?” she asked, pointing across the street at the record store.

“Uh, sure,” Alyssa replied.

“Is your favorite band going to have a new album soon?” Judith questioned, leading her sister across the street.

“Yeah. They just finished recording it last week. But they haven’t mixed it yet,” she answered without even thinking.

“How do you know that?”

Alyssa’s eyes flicked to her sister quickly, “I read it somewhere.”

“Uh huh,” Judith said, obviously not believing her.

“Okay, Chris told me,” she claimed before pulling the door open and heading in.

Her little sister trotted in after her quickly, “You mean your new boyfriend, right?”

“He’s not my boyfriend. And who else would I mean?”

“The singer of the band?” she trailed behind Alyssa down an aisle.

Stopping she turned and leaned towards her sister and whispered, “What if I said they were one and the same?”

Judith’s eyes widened, “I don’t believe you.”

Alyssa shrugged, “Doesn’t mean it can’t be true.”

“Uh huh. It’s not. I know it’s not,” she responded.

“Think what you will. What are we looking for here?”

Judith shrugged, “I just thought you would want to come in since you like music.”

“Oh okay. Gotcha. Well, we can just browse for a bit before heading home. Good plan?”

They walked through two aisles before Judith spoke again, “When do I get to meet him?”

“Who?”

“Chris.”

“Not for a month.”

“Why?”

“Because I need to get to know him better first,” she explained. “And since I can only see him on weekends, it limits things.”

“Why can you only see him on weekends?”

“Because I have school, Judi.”

“So? See him afterwards,” she declared.

“I… not yet.”

“Why not?”

“Do you have to ask so many questions?”

“Yes. Dad says questions are good.”

“Dad is also a lawyer. He’s paid to ask questions.”

Judith stopped, her hands on her hips, “Alyssa, stop being such a spoilsport. See your new boyfriend during the week too. He has to be better than Zack.”

“He is. But I’m not going to–”

“Just go see him, Aly. Shesh.”

Sometimes nine year old’s had wisdom beyond their years.



Looking at the array of empty cans around them as they sat on the deck of Chris’s cabin, Eddie smirked. They had drank quite a bit, had talked work things, but not once more had Chris brought up the mysterious woman. Eddie did not want to pry, but it had been two days and he had every reason to believe that the woman was the reason Chris had retreated to the woods – or that his wife was that reason. And he wouldn’t have invited Eddie along with him if he hadn’t wanted to talk, right?

“So…” Eddie muttered before cracking open another beer.

“So,” Chris responded, sucking on his own.

“We’ve been here for two days. Any reason?”

“You wanna go back to the city, Ed?”

“No, of course not. Unless you’re ready to.”

“No, not yet. It’s only… Tuesday?”

Eddie glanced sideways at Chris, “And the day matters?”

“Yeah. I need to be back to Seattle by Friday.”

“And why is that?”

“Because.”

“Because why, Chris?”

“That’s when I get to see her again.”

Eddie’s eyebrows raised with that statement, “The girl?”

His eyes went to his best friend, “Uh, yeah.”

“Why don’t you see her sooner if you can’t fucking stop thinking about her?”

“Because she told me I couldn’t,” Chris responded.

“And why is that?”

“She wants to keep things in control.”

Eddie nodded, “So it’s hot and heavy, I take it?”

“No. She got mad when I kissed her.”

“You kissed her?”

“Twice.”

“And then she got mad.”

“Yeah.”

“Because she didn’t like it?”

Chris shook his head, “I don’t think so. She gave me a lot of reasons why we can’t kiss and not liking it was not one of them.”

“Did you like it?”

“Fuck, Ed, I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“Then why the hell are we up in the mountains and you’re not down there with her?”

“Because I can’t be.”

“Look, Chris, I am all for respecting a woman’s wishes, but you’re already stomping all over your marriage vows as it is. Clearly this girl means something to you and until you get her out of your system, you’re going to be stuck spinning your wheels. Us being up here hasn’t made a damn difference and you know it,” Eddie pointed out. “It’s time to go back, Chris.”

He stared into his best friend’s eyes for a moment, “What if she won’t have me?”

“Fuck, Chris. Really?”

“Yeah. Then I’ll have fucked up everything for nothing.”

Eddie shook his head, “The what-if game is far more dangerous. Don’t play it.”

Chris thought it over for a minute, “Finish your beer. We’re going back to the city.”

Two hours later as the sun began to sink into the ocean, the men returned to Seattle. Eddie really didn’t know much more about Chris’s mystery girl than he had before, but that wasn’t really the point. Chris had come to a decision about her and that was all that mattered. Eddie could not really remember the last time he had seen such determination in Chris’s eyes. This could either go horribly wrong or horribly right. Having seen his friend be tortured for so many years, he was hoping it went right. Regardless it was apparently about to begin.

“You’ll call me?” Eddie asked as he reached for the door handle.

“Maybe,” Chris responded.

Shrugging, he climbed out of Chris’s truck, “Well good luck, buddy.”

He really had no idea how he was going to accomplish what he wanted to do. And unfortunately he was certain Susan would be home and pissed he had taken off without so much as telling her a damn thing. That was one of the benefits of the cabin: it had no phone service. He was fairly certain that would lead to her yelling at him as soon as he stepped through the door, but he didn’t really care for once. Susan could wail all she wanted. He was going to see Alyssa soon somehow. And that balanced everything out.

True to form, Susan began to harass him as soon as she realized he was home. But he brushed much of it off, pretending to focus on making sure Jesse and Star were all settled back at home with the pack of smaller dogs. He finally turned around to face her, his eyes meeting her angry eyes.

“I just needed a couple of days alone, Suze. To re-focus. You don’t have to worry about a thing. The band is not in danger. And neither was I,” he stated.

“You could have at least left a fucking note,” she seethed.

He quickly leaned forward and kissed her angry mouth, though he felt little to nothing in the action, “I’m sorry, Suze. I didn’t mean to make you worry.”
“Uh huh,” she turned away, returning to the bedroom to finish putting her armor on. “Are you going to be with the band today?”

“Possibly. Probably. I don’t know,” he followed her in like a puppy dog, but more so he could get a change of clothes than anything.

“Well if you don’t remember, I need you to take me to the airport. I am flying to LA to negotiate some things for Alice,” Susan proclaimed.

“Uh, sure, babe,” he responded, opening their shared closet. “When do we need to be there?”

“An hour.”

“Then I guess I got home just in time,” Chris smirked. “Whenever you’re ready, we can go.”

It didn’t really occur to him how odd it was for Susan to be taking the last flight from Seattle to LA. He quickly reasoned it away with the fact she was likely at the office all day. It did not really matter to him; after all it meant she was going to be gone for… well he wasn’t sure how long, but any length of time was welcome. He should probably confirm when she would return.

“When do I need to pick you up?” he asked, following her out of the room a few minutes later, carrying her suitcase.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll get a ride with Jerry,” she responded.

“You sure?”

“I wouldn’t want to interrupt your Sunday hangover,” Susan declared, acid tinting her voice.

“Susan,” he warned.

“I’ll come back with Jerry. Don’t worry about it,” she repeated.

“Fine, fine.”



She could not believe what she was doing. Why had she listened to her nine year old sister? Judith was just a child, a girl, who could not know at all what the implications were behind what she pushed Alyssa to do. But she had kept it up since Sunday, which precisely led to the reason why she was heading to Chris’s house after school that Wednesday. Judith was certainly playing devil’s advocate. But she was supposed to be young and innocent…

“Dammit, Judi,” she muttered under her breath as she turned down his street.

There really was no reason for her to even believe he would be home, but it wasn’t like she had his number to call and find out. Alyssa convinced herself that if he was home, then it was meant to be; if he wasn’t, then it wasn’t. Plain and simple. Of course she was refusing to factor in whether or not his wife was home, but they were just friends – platonic friends. His wife had nothing to fear – or so she kept telling herself.

Pulling up in front of the house, she parked her car and took a deep breath. Was she really doing this? Was she really about to walk up to Chris’s front door and knock? She hadn’t come all this way to do nothing. She was there; all she needed to do was get out of the car and head up to the door. Taking another deep breath, Alyssa opened her door, fixed her short, black corduroy skirt, and rounded the car to head to the door. Her gold-flecked eyes glanced over the modest brick house, noting the sad-looking flowers near the doorstep. She was nearly tempted to stop and pull out a few stray weeds, but instead focused her attention back on the door. Her hand trembled slightly as she reached up to the door. What if he wasn’t home? What if his wife was? Was she crazy to even be trying?

Throwing her fears into the wind, Alyssa knocked. Each heartbeat seemed to boom in her ears as she waited for someone to answer, anyone. Deciding she had not been heard, she knocked again, a bit louder. This knock set off a chorus of barking inside the house, letting Alyssa know she had been heard that time. They suddenly quieted, a muffled voice telling them to do so. Her heart froze inside her chest. He was home…

The door opened and their eyes met. He seemed far more surprised than she expected him to be, but then again she had not given him any indication he would see her before Friday. For a long moment they stood there, just staring into each other’s eyes. Alyssa was certain if they did not break the tension soon, her knees were going to buckle underneath the pressure.

“Lyssie,” he muttered.

“Can I… can I come in?” she requested softly.

“Please do,” he swung the door open.

Alyssa stepped across the threshold, her eyes instantly snapping to the pair of dogs behind Chris. They too took great interest in her, quickly stepping forward to sniff and assess her. Smiling she squatted to their level, offering her flat hands out to them. Both Jesse and Star sniffed her hands and licked her palms.

“They like you. I can’t blame them,” Chris commented after closing the door.

She rubbed both of their heads simultaneously before standing fully up and turning to face Chris again, “Sorry I didn’t let you know I was coming. I just…”

He smiled, “I’m glad you came over. I was… I was trying to figure out how I might see you before Friday.”

“Really?”

He nodded, “But then I realized I really have no way to track you down. All I know is where you work.”

“I know. I… I could give you my number,” she spoke, her voice a bit unsure. “But you have to… not call at certain times.”

“It’s up to you.”

Alyssa nodded, tearing her eyes away from his to maintain some of her composure, “This is a nice house.”

“But not what you expected?”

“Actually,” she turned around and looked at the modest decorations in the foyer and the glimpse of the living room she could see, “no. It seems to suit you.”

“Well come in, come in. I’ll give you a quick little tour,” Chris offered.

He led her through the public spaces on the ground level. The décor was all understated but homey. She was certain it cost more than it likely looked, but that wasn’t the point. Chris – and Susan, she presumed – had a very down-to-earth style. Alyssa instantly felt all right in the house.

Stopping at the bottom of the stairs, Chris motioned up them, “And then there are a couple of bedrooms and bathrooms up there.”

Her eyes travelled up the sweep of the stairs, “Where do you… record demos?”

His gaze snapped to hers and he smiled, “Upstairs. It’s not really a studio or anything. More like an office with a tape recorder.”

“Oh okay.”

“Would you like something to drink?”

“Sure.”

Leading her back to the kitchen, Chris pulled open the fridge door and looked inside. He hesitated in what to offer her. Deciding four in the afternoon was too early to be offering beer, he pulled out two bottles of water, opened both, and handed one to Alyssa. Wordlessly they drifted back to the living room, sitting next to each other on the couch. She sipped the water and let her eyes wander a bit more, finding his Grammy on the bookcase.

Noticing her gaze, Chris was suddenly overly self-conscious about the award, “Uh, yeah…”

Her eyes went back to him, “You don’t have to be embarrassed for what you’ve accomplished, Chris. I think it’s great.”

“I… well thanks. I just…”

She reached over and touched his hand gently, “I already know that about you, remember?”

He nodded, “Why did you… why did you…?”

“Come over?” she finished.

Chris nodded again, “Yeah.”

“Well you’ll have to thank my sister for that. She thought it was a good idea. I wasn’t sure about it, because… well yeah. But after her harassing me about it for a couple of days, I gave in. So here I am,” she explained.

He set his bottle on the glass coffee table in front of them before leaning back casually on the couch, “I will certainly have to thank her whenever presented the chance. Especially since I’ve been trying to figure out how to track you down before Friday myself.”

“Why? Already planning on ditching me Friday?” she asked, setting her bottle down as well.

“No, not at all. Because… because I can’t stop thinking about you, Lyssie,” he admitted.

Alyssa flushed, “But Chris, we…”

He reached for her hand, “You can’t deny there is something between us or you wouldn’t be here right now.”

“Chris, I don’t think you know what you’re saying,” she stated, eyes venturing back up to his.

“I know precisely what I’m saying. And you know it.”

Her eyes dropped down to where their hands were joined. She could not deny there was something between them, not at all. And it had nothing to do with his fame; she knew that; he had to as well. She would not have defied all of her logical thoughts to be sitting with him on his couch in his living room. Everything told her that she should not be there, should not be entertaining any idea of anything with this man. But despite everything that had happened to her recently, she felt not only safe around him, but completely comfortable. It was a bit of a foreign feeling and yet not all at once.

“Chris… we can’t be anything more than friends,” she declared, eyes returning to his.

“Why?”

“Because you’re married.”

“That’s changeable.”

“You are not leaving your wife for me,” Alyssa stated. “That’s just stu–”

Chris quickly leaned in and kissed her to silence her, “Lyssie…”

She turned her cheek to him, keeping him from kissing her again, “Chris, I told you to not kiss me again.”

His free hand went to her chin, turning her face back to his, “Why?”

“Because if you kiss me again, I’ll fall for you. And married men are off limits.”

He ignored the second sentence and kissed her again, “Fall for me, Lyssie. I’m falling for you.”